First week of school has been very tiring for me. I must say that indeed the grace of God is more than enough…if not I would have fallen. Looking at my back to back time-table and the amount of admin to do everyday, gosh…it will take a superhuman to do so many things. I must be really crazy to be a teacher. I have so many things in my mind, waiting for me to put a tick beside them to indicate that i have finished with them. Unfortunately, I have not been able to put those ticks against them. How tragic! I must really spend my long weekends to clear off some marking and do some class admin. It is just the first week of school but I feel that I have been teaching for 7 or 8 weeks. Gosh, I really need the grace of God to cover me and His mercy to renew me everyday.
I must keep telling myself that I must stay very focussed in accomplishing all the list of things that I need to finish. My tiredness and weariness have easily allow me to slip into a state of dormant and I tend to hibernate myself after one whole day of lessons. This is really no good. I must press on and press on and press on. And get myself up the momentum again.
One thing good is that my class seems to be more motivated this time round. There’s still sloppiness but I feel less of it this term. I hope they will continue to sustain their momentum and continue to move onwards towards their N Level Exams. I thank God for everyone of them. I think despite being very passive and not proactive, they are very nice people and my prayer goes out to them. Of course I really hope that all of them go up to Sec 5 and do their O Level, but I know realistically it is not quite possible. I think it is not a matter of faith but just statistic. Well, but maybe God can change the statistic? Pardon me for my lack of faith then….hahahaha….but seriously, I want them to do well and I will try my very best to help them. I know I may not be the best but I will strive to give my best to them….
Perhaps my passion is not all lost….perhaps that little that was ignited 6 years ago is still burning…though not as bright but it is still giving out that light that will break the darkness away. Will need the Holy Spirit to fan the flame and give me oil in my lamp…to keep me burning.